5 things to stop saying to a child with ADHD

Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, more widely known as ADHD, is among the most common mental disorders in children and teens. Not just children and teens, plenty of adults have it too. According to a national survey of parents using data from 2022, an estimated 7 million (11.4%) U.S. children aged 3–17 years have ever been diagnosed with ADHD.


What is ADHD?

Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) is a neurodevelopmental disorder that affects how the brain processes information. It's characterized by symptoms of inattention, hyperactivity, and impulsivity.

How common is ADHD?

ADHD is a common neurodevelopmental disorder in children, with an estimated 1 in 9 U.S. children having been diagnosed with it, and boys being diagnosed more often than girls.

The average age of ADHD diagnosis is 7 years old. Symptoms of ADHD typically first appear between the ages of 3 and 6. Boys (15%) are more likely to be diagnosed with ADHD than girls (8%). About 6 in 10 children had moderate or severe ADHD. Despite these concerning numbers, ADHD is nowhere near ‘under control’. Rather, the graph is inclining upward.



Symptoms of ADHD in kids:

In children with ADHD, symptoms often present as inattention, hyperactivity, and impulsivity, which can manifest as difficulty focusing, restlessness, and acting without thinking.

Here's a more detailed look at these symptoms:

Inattention:

Difficulty paying attention: Struggling to focus on tasks, easily distracted, and having trouble listening or following instructions.

Forgetfulness: Often forgetting everyday tasks, losing things, and having difficulty staying organized.

Careless mistakes: Making mistakes due to not paying close attention to details.

Avoiding tasks that require sustained mental effort: Finding it hard to do homework or other tasks that require focus, unless they are something they enjoy.

Daydreaming: Frequently appearing to be lost in thought or daydreaming.


Hyperactivity:

Excessive physical movement: Fidgeting, squirming, and having trouble staying seated.

Restlessness: Feeling constantly "on the go" or having difficulty staying still.

Talking excessively: Talking too much or interrupting conversations.

Difficulty playing quietly: Having trouble with quiet activities or hobbies.

Blurting out answers: Answering questions before they are fully asked or interrupting others.

Impulsivity:

Acting without thinking: Acting impulsively or without considering the consequences of their actions.

Difficulty waiting their turn: Having trouble waiting for their turn in games or conversations.

Interrupting others: Interrupting conversations, games, or activities.

Losing control of emotions: Experiencing difficulty managing their emotions or having emotional outbursts.



What NOT to say to a kid with ADHD?

To support a child with ADHD, avoid phrases that dismiss their struggles, like "just focus" or "you'll outgrow it". Instead, focus on understanding their challenges and offering practical solutions and encouragement.

Here are 5 things to stop saying to a child with ADHD:

"Just focus" or "Stop fidgeting":

These phrases can be frustrating and dismissive, as ADHD makes sustained focus and controlling impulses difficult.

"Everyone gets distracted sometimes":

While true, this statement doesn't acknowledge the specific challenges ADHD presents, which can lead to significant difficulties in daily life.

"You'll outgrow it":

ADHD is a neurodevelopmental condition, and while symptoms may change over time, they often persist into adulthood.

"Why can't you be normal?":

This phrase can make a child feel different and inadequate, which is counterproductive to building self-esteem and confidence.

"You're not trying" or "You're lazy":

These statements can damage a child's self-worth and motivation, particularly since ADHD can make it difficult to complete tasks or control impulses.
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